Hello there, I'm on mushrooms and really high, Mind fried, reporting live from the darkside, Who am I? that's for you to decide, I have many different names and any of these will do fine, My mom calls me dipshit, my teachers call me stupid, My grandma calls me a wigger, cuz I'm making rap music, My canceller calls me crazy, the cops call me "freeze!!" I call myself IDP but fans call me WaltD, But I don't give a fuck call me what you will, Just recognize the fact that my rap skills are ill, Make you sick like me when I had bumps on my dick, If you get offended by this then stop bumping this shit, But be prepared to miss the album of the decade, And to avoid every place where real hip hop is played, Still on board, get ready for a ride, To the deep recesses of my mind..... "the darkside." I'd like to welcome yall to the darkside, The place where dreams come to die, I'd like to welcome yall to the darkside, The place that you can get high, I'd like to welcome yall to the darkside, The CD that made my mom cry, I'd like to welcome yall to the darkside, What the darkside, yup, yup, the darkside Want to see interracial sex hen turn on your TV, You'll see me fucking ET on CBC, Now they're calling me a cereal rapist, Cuz I killed Captain Crunch and Tony Tigers in my basement, But let's face it Barbie needs another face lift, Cuz if not Ken won't pay to get her wasted, Man so much evil amongst me, So I bomb the track like it was a middle eastern country, So vibe to it, my fucked up music, Leave your brain warped weeks after you use it. Drop this pill cap of dope rap and you'll never go back, To wrap corporate crap that aint giving you half, The shit that I have, in the last minute, it's authentic, Like a sailor getting ripped off spinach, So jump with it, cuz hip hop just got revived, "It's alive" in an uglier version of Frankenstein, I'd like to welcome yall to the darkside, The place where dreams come to die, I'd like to welcome yall to the darkside, The place that you can get high, I'd like to welcome yall to the darkside, The CD that made my mom cry, I'd like to welcome yall to the darkside, What the darkside, yup, yup, the darkside Stranger danger, I'm chilling out with space invaders, They terminators "what" all clones of Arnold Schwarzenegger, Collecting data to store and save it for later, Track behaviors, then report to Darth Vader, "WaltD I'm your..." Don't say my father, That's awarded cuz last week I fuck your daughter, "What the Fuck" I'm too nasty for the dark side, Style so ill, people vomit as they pass by, This white guy, with no white left in his eyes, A bird with broken wings who been left to die, Bound to fly like my brothers be write , The nimbus in the sky that envelopes the mic, So sit tight, A fasten your fucking seat belt. "Ok" cuz the dark side is bad for your health, Like popping pill sitting seven year on a shelf, Or like taking the TV onion instead or make one yourself, I'd like to welcome yall to the darkside, The place where dreams come to die, I'd like to welcome yall to the darkside, The place that you can get high, I'd like to welcome yall to the darkside, The CD that made my mom cry, I'd like to welcome yall to the darkside, What the darkside, yup, yup, the darkside

Welcome to a Life run by your cell phone, Welcome to a world run by cell phone drones, The voice in my dome says leave it alone, I can't cuz I'm prone to be stuck in this zone, In this position, unlike your car I run efficient, On a mission to release tension and suspicion, Pasted bitching moved into action, Problems get hard divide them into fractions, Can't please them all, haters so numerous, Despite what the rumors is, keep it humus, I may be new to this but I know what music is, Refection of self, who you are and how you live, If you do it for the bizz, I feel sorry, Making lots money but telling another mans story, You bore me dog with your typical raps, I'll dance round you with my typical cats, Amputee's throw your limps up, bulimics throw your lunch up Fat fucks stand up, Coma patients wake up, What you want? To show you life without her makeup, I'll trying to make her better before her and I break up, x2 I'm at a standstill, I've forgotten how to feel, I question everything cuz I don't know if it's real, Seemingly pointless what's it all for? It's got to be more than money and hoers, Am I being scored points for the afterlife, Get a negative one every time I aint acting right, That can't be right, And if I'm being judged, I don't want to join a club of clicky assholes up above, I just spread my love, from coast to coast, Ride round in a van with lots to smoke, Cuz life's a joke and I'm here to laugh, so I'll be skipping in the meadow with a pound of grass, Share half stash, If you be lacking that, Cuz I'm looking for some friends in this habitat, So where ever you at? From the front to the back, Go wild with the style when you hear this track, Amputee's throw your limps up, bulimics throw your lunch up Fat fucks stand up, Coma patients wake up, What you want? To show you life without her makeup, I'll trying to make her better before her and I break up, x2

Teacher - "And that class is how babies are made." IDP - "Miss, miss, miss I have a question." Teacher - "Walter put your hand down." IDP - "But Miss, but miss, it's a really important question." Teacher - "I'm not answering another one of your stupid questions." IDP - "No, no miss, but I really need this question answered." Teacher - "You want to go back to the office WaltD?" I remember when, I did well at school once, But when they found out I was cheating, "detention for two months", I was the dumb ass who showed up stoned to class, And when they'd ask "why your eyes red" I'd just laugh, Get sent to the office then force against a wall, "We know you got drugs son" uh-uh I smoked them all, I seemed like every teachers favorite person to hate, just cuz I taught the retarded kids how to masturbate, I've been asked of late, "what you'd learn in school?" Nothing dog, I just tried to be cool, Acted a fool, math science to history, "Well If you could go back, then what would to do differently?" I'd find the principle, Throw my shit in his face, Well screaming at him "you can't civilize the human race", Run away get the same shitty job that I work today, When the beat plays, a diploma don't matter any way So fuck high school , I sit right here just dropping these jewels, So fuck high school , Now I'm in the real world playing by my own rules, So fuck high school, They just taught me to act a damn fool So fuck high school, "What?" I said fuck high school, I bashed my head off lockers just to make high school easy, So if kids teased me I'm say I'd stab them and they'd believe me, And if they came back to kick ass with some friends to help, I'd beat them to the punch and start clocking myself, Shrinks and counselors trying to probe my head, Should have been a morticians cuz I was already dead, I asked why drag this corpse to class? If half the teachers made I clean I wasn't gon'a pass, The facility hated me the girl rarely dated me, During the bomb threat the swat team sedated me, Yelling "Drop the bomb and step away from the napalm" It's for my project on Vietnam, the text books got it wrong, Girl Screaming - "OMG WaltD's got a bomb!" IDP - "Fuck you cunt for not taking me to prom, and fuck you miss Kennedy for failing me you bitch!" Swat Officer - " Put that gun down, Put the bomb down, Put that bomb down!" So fuck high school , I sit right here just dropping these jewels, So fuck high school , Now I'm in the real world playing by my own rules, So fuck high school, They just taught me to act a damn fool So fuck high school, "What?" I said fuck high school, DROP OUT RIGHT NOW

IDP - "yo, yo man, you got a bag?" Stranger 1 - "No, I got nothing" IDP - 'No, alright that's cool. Yo, yo you got dreads you got to have some weed. You got some weed?" Stranger 2 - "No I got no weed." IDP - "Oh ok, that's cool. Yo, yo man, you look like you know where the stash is at. Tell me you got drugs? Stranger 3 - "No I got no drugs" IDP - "Something, anything? Man." I need DRUGS. to send me on the up and up, Cuz the whores from Giffidor need to get fucked, But the magic mushrooms from Hogwarts wasn't even enough, So I found the kids from Huffelpuff who were huffing stuff, Mixed that with a couple stems and caps, Run laps till I passed out and collapsed, Woke up in Alcatraz with a Hannibal mask, And told me "you ODed on shrooms and gas," Fuck that rather have an alcoholic relapses, Get smash, snap fuck a bitch in the ass, Yeah I'm WaltD and you know I get dirty with it, Do drugs like my old uncle Burney did it, Three drops on M, doing shots with him, Mysterious power? "mother fucker throw it in" Cuz I need to get fucked like a nifo at an orgy, Being sobers like your rap skill it fucking bores me, Monkey to a man, man to a junky, I could stop know but it's getting funky, Funky, It's the high life and the highlight of my life, Is getting high all night "damn right" And people seem to think I'm cool, Cuz I used drugs instead of going to school, But fuck passing classes I'm worried about the affect of acid, Hey dad is this shit going make my dick flaccid? "No son but pills will kill you quicker" Well I gave up liquor doctor said something about my liver, So I sand and deliver in till I fall over, Yeah I'll quit weed when my mom gets sober, But we know that she never will, "Your rhymes are ill" that why she need prescription pills, But that's what that bitch gets for trying to raise Satan, Afflictions of drug addiction that's never breaking, So I'm not worried about burning in hell, Cuz at least I won't have to do drugs by myself, Monkey to a man, man to a junky, I could stop know but it's getting funky, Funky,

People ask "how did you devolve your powers" I use water from the pacific for taking a shower, Fukushima is what I yell when I'm fighting crime, Going out blowing up oil company pipe line, Then its off to wall mart to fucking trash the place, My names now psycomatic, the basket case, Wear a basket over my face, as I save the human race, From self destruction, to tell me what your function, Flash the signal and I'll be there, I roll round town like superman up in his wheelchair, "Yo there's trouble here," go straight to the center, Spit sick son, with my uncooked dinner, The toxic avenger, ADD never giving in, Call me batman cuz my enemy is riddle, Still fiddling with my utility belt, Fuck all yall pussies, I'm saving myself, Three, two, one, ZEROO!!!!! Your local rhyming action hero, True is, I'm not saving the world, Really I'm just here cuz I'm fucking your girl, x2 (Nieo) im basket case with a mask and cape weilding a plasic rake, held together with some masking tape the last action hero is late, the navagtion system took me right off of the fucking peer to the lake... wait (car noises,splash fx) harvey dent my face dented only a mother could love me. saving lives cost money course im republican dummy truth is ive endded more lives than ive really saved but what the fuck do i give a shit, it looks cool any way/ plus i get my picture of on the daily bugle, i just wish theyd give me more credit for my work cuz they rarley do tho ill go insane for the brain of lois lane till i don't notice pain and can lift a locomovitve train back upright. I just happen be here cuz I saved a chick with big tittes and she could fuck nice/ so until the justice league give me other placement if you need me check my mothers basement.. Three, two, one, ZEROO!!!!! Your local rhyming action hero, True is, I'm not saving the world, Really I'm just here cuz I'm fucking your girl, x2

Hardcore battler - "Wait you want to battle me?" Other Battler - "yeah I'll battle you" Hardcore battler - "Well come lets fucking battle dog." Hardcore battler - "Me and you, we going to fucking do this!" Hardcore battler - "Rap battle son" Other Battler - "yeah let's bring it" You think a battle with IDP is a good idea, the last person to fuck with me got syphilis and gonorrhea, I eat you for dinner but you'll still never be shit, Slipped in an oil spill you still wouldn't be slick, Consume rotten food you still couldn't get ill, Coming down for mushrooms you still couldn't get real, Cuz you faker then a porn stars tits, while I'm sick like when that bitch gets her corn hole licked, Spitting fire, so stop drop and roll, If your fly your just a plane that's out of control, pull a gun out at a show, crowd still wouldn't get down, you must record on the toilet cuz you got a shitty sound, you should skip town before I get mad, Go back in time and kick your dad directly in the gonads, It's so sad, that you trying to be better, than IDP the cleverest rapper to endeavor in crushing whoever, Step ups, Step up? and get your rep cut, like the gut of a slut who can't keep her fucking cunt shut, labeled a mutt, but I'm a new breed, The breed of dope MC, so yall better watch for me, x2 My minds a place where thoughts get raped, Inseminated with hate, Build an army lying in wait, For some chump to step up and try and battle me, I Batter so called bader MC's, leave them tatter with ease, Wouldn't be left in change if they rechargeable batteries, These pussys wont act up, even if they had allergies, ...or some wired venereal disease, I keep it clean so yall ain't fucking with me, When I say clean I mean a bums breath who's been sipping Listerine. a liquor fiend, with a busted spleen, smoking nicotine, so where's the coco baby? they call me Loco Crazy, I'm Russian roulette... you sure you want to play me? you should give up, and just take a hike, You're a dyke you shouldn't be fucking with a mike, You think your dope? you thought baking soda was coke, The only you got on my is blood when I slit your throat! Step up? and get your rep cut, like the gut of a slut who can't keep her fucking cunt shut, labeled a mutt, but I'm a new breed, The breed of dope MC, so yall better watch for me, x2 Crowd yells angrily Judge - "Order in the court room. Order in the court room. Walter Draper in the murdering of the mic, we find you guilty." WaltD - " yall better fucking remember that. WaltD, IDP, I fucking kill a mic son."

Boss - "WaltD what the fuck is this man?" IDP - "What's what?" Boss - "These dishes aren't fucking clean." IDP - "Sorry" Boss - "You'll have to do every single one of these mother fuckers again." IDP - "Yes sir" Boss - "Don't fuck up this time" When I write this Microsoft Word bleeds emotion, Not from a magical potion but a flipped expo notion, Tear drops to fill an ocean, so I'm floating. Upon smashed dreams and broking tokens, I can't ride the tram, wallets already slammed, Immigrant from out of town, worn out and broken down, I'll be around, waiting at the street crossing! Same shitty boots cuz you make no money dish washing, 24 but no worth more the minimum wage, Peddle floored but can't get out this fucking way, Of living greasy, I know my family needs me, Mind says keep going but body need to take it easy, My legs are tired, from always walking to work, No time to do laundry, wearing the same smelly shirt. My feet hurt I want to take a rest, But I can't afford the bullet to put through my chest, I may be dope. but I'm broke, Got dirty rhymes, cuz I can't afford soap, I can't cope, Cuz I'm broke, I deserve to die slow, so I smoke, x2 I'm WaltD. don't ask who am I? I'm just another white guy.. completing suicide, Want to die but it won't come soon enough, Swallowed my pride but then I throw it up, Do I give a fuck, I wish I didn't, I want money, but I can't get it, Man, Monkey, Ses pool , nothing but a fool, 5 years out of high school, 4 since I've been cool, Fuck this, fuck a bucket list, give me a hit, Wait cancel that, can't afford that shit, Back to bad habits, an addict on his grind, No time to rhyme but enough to loss my mind, Repetitive cycle, the cycle repeats, Repetitive cycle, still can't afford beats, No-one paying attention yall can't afford me, Wanted to kill self, since they didn't abort me I may be dope. but I'm broke, Got dirty rhymes, cuz I can't afford soap, I can't cope, Cuz I'm broke, I deserve to die slow, so I smoke, x2 It's too often I think of offing my head, Get three hours in bed, I want a coffin instead, Coiffing what my lung bled into the sink, Soon we'll all be dead so I give a fuck what you think, Act like money this solve all my problems, That's funny, I don't know a rich who don't got them So nieve, must this shit on TV, That makes be believe that cash is really what I need, I need boy scouts to teach me how to tie a noose, I need the balls to kick the fucking chair loose, But I got none of that, I got table scraps, Handing down from assholes who don't want to hear me rap, I may be dope. but I'm broke, Got dirty rhymes, cuz I can't afford soap, I can't cope, Cuz I'm broke, I deserve to die slow, so I smoke, x2

Saint Xavier - "Alright, take this, go in there, kill it and meet me back at the crib, what I just say?" IDP - "Go in there, kill it, meet you back at the crib." Saint Xavier - "Get the Fuck out!" IDP - "Go in there, kill it, meet you back at the crib, go in there, kill it, meet you back at the crib. Turn that fucking shit off, turn the music down! eh!" GUN SHOT! IDP - "Shut your fucking lips cunt, eh you small fry keep talking, I said shut the fuck up" Guy in crowd - "OMG it's Eminem" GUN SHOT! IDP - "Say I look think Eminem one more time, Who's next? It's WaltD mother fuckers. DJ put this fucking track on." DJ - "Alright, alright man, take it easy" IDP - "Alright alright, yeah, yeah, WaltD. Now that we all have our place. We understand how this works. I'ma get this mother fucking party started. So go back to drinking your drinks. Going back to acting retarded. Here we go man, here we go, WaltD about to flow." Wouldn't be great, If you could smack every single person that you hate directly in the face? "how's that taste?" Like a fist full of shit Cuz your moms the bitch. that flipped, Threw a hissy fit, tell me who got clipped, "Ouch" fucking kids don't listen to my CD, Cuz when you smoke pot your parent will blame me, Or maybe ADD, "he should take a pill for that" Half meth, shits whack, where the weed be at? yeah I'm that guy no government prescribed high, Got a plan from the green earth getting me by, "Ringing" "hey dog you need more?" Yeah, what the fuck you think I called you for? Not to hang out "but WaltD I love the beats," Well here's the new track put this shit on repeat, Smash your face against the dash till you drive off the street, I killed this hit so die to the beat, Killing the beat, Killing the beat, Die mother fucker, Take it easy, Killing it, I'm WaltD, passed giving a fuck Cuz I passed my need to put my dick in a slut, She can hold my nuts but not a conversation, mamamamamamamama Where's your medication, No brods no problems at all, Walk around town with my pair of sweaty ball, "Uw gross" fuck you I ain't out to impress, I try to clean up but my life a mess, So I went ow to London to salvage this wreak, Got golden beats, treasure provided by Mr.X "Rowl" So let it all happen, We taking this game and abolishing whack rapping, Got control of 25 percent of my flow, The rest comes natural though my H2O, So take a seat while I'm killing this beat, When this gets chopped I'll send you a peace, Killing the beat, Killing the beat, Die mother fucker, Take it easy, Killing it, IDP - "Die mother fucker, piece of shit. I'ma slice you up. It's done, it's done, it's done."

Tom Newsman - "Hello its Tom Newsman, bring you this live breaking news story of a disgruntled man being chased by an angry mob of people. Seems like the angry man has been confronting the people. Making rude obscene gestures. Here he is sprinting down the street." IDP - "Fucking cunts" People get mad when I open my mouth, I say offensive shit soon you'll be knocking me, like a shovel to your grave I'm ripping you up, celibate with two sluts not giving a fuck, When I Spit it's like I'm packing a lip, When these kids get hit is a additive as shit, IDP/WaltD... he can rhyme, I'm like a three-way two mother fuckers at the same time, A walking contradiction who you get with?, I don't really give a shit bitch, I'm sit here and just vibe and spit, your option sucks so tell it to my dick, Sleeping at the wheel so I'm bound flip, Get pissed, Drops rhymes in need of some censorship, I think you kids are a little too sensitive, It's just my hate conveyed though rhyming sentences, Tom Newsman - "The disgruntled man has now been reported as IDP. A local rapper who is every pissed off that no-one is buying albums anymore. He has now found a silver hatchback and is making a clean get-a-way from the mob but he still has the police right on this tail. Its looks like nothing will stop this IDP from getting the vengeance he deserves. Oh my, what a tragedy this is on this day. Plenty of deaths to go around." I've embraced the fact things never go my way, I'm driving down the wrong side of the highway, "What if you die", I already got no life, "What if you get hurt" you know it's free healthcare right, Canada's the place to be for broke fiends like me, Stab yourself in the leg And I get a free vial of morphine, Yeah.... so come quick kid and let's get lifted, Lets party like George bush just got convicted, YYEEEEEAAAAAHHHH. Fuck the man, Fuck the Politian with the dirty underhanded plan, When they go whack, and start twisting the facts, Go paraplegic on his ass, I never stand for that, Then I get pissed and spit this viscous, The opposite of fetch, cuz I'm bringing it to you bitches, This hate and rage placed on a page, If you don't want to offended get the fuck out my way, Tom Newsman - "Here he is heading downtown now, towards the crowds of people. Flipping them off outside the window. hanging his penis out now his asshole. He quite an obesence man. Here he is stopping at Mr. X's house a known super villain. He is coming out with shotguns and lots of ammo. Looks like their going downtown to have quite a riot. So everyone stay in your homes." (Saint Xavier) Tom Newsman -"Mr. X is now hanging out the window having pop shots at grandmothers, small children and pregnant women. Here the lead police car is making the PIT maneuver to stop down these two hooligans. True hooligans I might add. Oh-no, shots are going off everywhere. police are going down. Mr. X is boiling over cop cars. There's gun shots going off everywhere. A blaze of glory these men are going down in. One cop down, two cop down, now three. They just aren't stopping. The police force is coming in hard now. Guns a blazing SWAT teams with their bullet proof vests. It looks like IDP is making his way to the back of the car now. Oh my it seems he's pulled out an RGP. Tom get the fuck out of the way. Tom look out oh-no!!"

Evil Pastor - "We are all gathered here today to honor the life and death of Walter Draper. When he was not shooting down news reporters and blowing up there helicopters, He was corrupting the minds of young children. Fuck yeah." Spitting written dead, stab your neck with the pen, Till your heads like my heart not getting attached again, Bring your girl she'll be treated the same, My cock is like a zombie always looking for brain, IDP's insane nope I'm In-Divine Providence, I don't need incompetent complements for confidence, Not on the fence, naw I'm making my presence felt, Sacrifice my health before getting stuck on the shelf, Cuz that's were their placing me cuz I'm braking your compliancy, No philosophical thought? we're feeling that vacancy, In the place to be milling the facts, by now Schrödinger's cat is dead as fuck and it ain't coming back, Cuz you only hold life for a moment, If you guaranteed to lose it you really think you own it? "What?" I said if you guaranteed to lose it you really think you own it? Machete to the head, fuck it I'm already dead, Sling my raps for these gods instead, You can take off my legs, fill my body with lead, Do nothing at all anyways I'm bound to be dead, x2 Your threats of death do not alarm me, I'm coming back as part of a zombie army, Comprised of kids that never lived past the age of six, With stones and sticks we brake bones and brick, Dictatorships flip were knowledge exists, Think collage constitutes this acknowledge my fist, I'm getting piss now I'm six steps from death, Cuz I died six times "now other three left," The cool cat chasing the rat pack trying to bring rap back, To skill to kill the track not to advertise and act, People say that's the way the world works now, Well Simon says it works like a merry-go-round, Put your feet on the ground put your stereos down, Before this corporate crap becomes your burial sound, Cuz every pound of flesh is bound to death, So I don't waste breath cuz soon I'll have none left, Machete to the head, fuck it I'm already dead, Sling my raps for these gods instead, You can take off my legs, fill my body with lead, Do nothing at all anyways I'm bound to be dead, x2 Evil Pastor - "oh fuck. So we lay him down into the earth. Where he belonged. In brown smothering hole of hell, and I promise to take care of his wife always and his children of course. mmmm, Children." IDP yelling from the coffin Evil Pastor - "Shut up, shut up. Quite in there."